What If You Don’t Have a Passion?

I totally admire people who have a passion. They wake up every morning and know what they want to do.

I recently went on a weekend trip to Amsterdam to see a friend. I went with another friend whom I didn’t know as well as the friend I was visiting.

We shared a hotel room because we were travelling on a budget, but the upside was that we got to know each other better, which was great. We had many conversations about life, philosophy, and everything in between.

I told her that I’m not very happy with work right now. I’ve been doing the same thing for about 20 years. I’m obviously having a midlife crisis, and I don’t know what to do with myself.

The problem I find is that I don’t have a passion.

There are many things I enjoy doing. I like walking the dog, running, growing my own vegetables, reading, and sometimes cooking. I like a little bit of everything.

But I’m not especially passionate about any of them. For example, I would never run a marathon—or even an ultramarathon. I grow my own vegetables, but I don’t dedicate my entire life to it. I scatter a few seeds here and there and hope for the best. Sometimes, I don’t even remember which variety of tomatoes I’m growing.

But I thoroughly enjoy being outdoors and watching something grow from a seed before eventually seeing it on my plate.

My new friend said she felt the same way—that she wasn’t passionate about anything in particular. She had taken cooking courses and tried various hobbies, but nothing had stuck in the long term.

So I had this eureka moment: I’m not the only one who doesn’t have a passion.

And that’s okay, because we go online and see all these people on social media who are crazy about running, growing vegetables, or spending time with their dogs.

On social media, I’m shown a curated image of women growing their own vegetables, baking their own bread, canning and preserving food, eating fully organic meals, and wearing immaculate old-school clothes. It all looks so calm and appealing—this ideal of slow living that makes me want it too.

Sometimes I would love to have a slower life and more time for myself, but the reality is different. There’s a mortgage to pay and everyday costs to cover, and living is expensive. So is that kind of life actually attainable? That’s when I start thinking: if only I had a passion I could tap into, perhaps I could quit the rat race and get paid for doing something I love.

Even my boyfriend seems to have a passion. Since we moved to the countryside six years ago, he has become obsessed with trees. He has planted more than 20 trees, stops to take photos of them, and knows all their Latin names. I love trees too, but I would never get quite so deeply into them—or anything else.

So don’t feel bad if you’re one of us who doesn’t feel passionate about anything in particular. There are plenty of us out there.